I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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