Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Randomize
