Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize