so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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