Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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