It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
