Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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