I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
