he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
