it hurts more in the daytime
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
