Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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