do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
no more duck duck goose at the bar
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Randomize