Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
i've created a new STD.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
