i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
