I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
