If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
