I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
