Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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