i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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