If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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