so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
