just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
