Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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