I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
