Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
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