why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
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