I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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