then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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