It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
