I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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