He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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