you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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