actually, I'm a sock model
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
