Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
