Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Randomize
