you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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