GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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