Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Randomize
