You're so nebulous sometimes
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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