Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
wow bdsm is so cute
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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