Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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