Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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