How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
