oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
We're not piercing ourselves today.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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