with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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