last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
