What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize