....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
