Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
