I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Dick very happy bro
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
