There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
